Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
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