You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
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