So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
that is very illegal...i love you.
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