the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize