He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
