you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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