do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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