I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
Randomize
