i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
