im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Randomize
