I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
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