Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Randomize