I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
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