My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
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