i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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