How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I came so hard my ears popped.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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