Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
