hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
