He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize
