I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Randomize
