Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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