i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Randomize
