I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
31 Times Kim Kardashian Showed Her Love For Balmain
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
19 Tricks To Help You Join The Mile High Club
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?