Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Brb crying the tears of my youth
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
