take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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