uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
how does that bad decision feel?
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize