3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
