Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
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