Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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