My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
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I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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