Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Randomize
