Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
