Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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