I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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