I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
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