Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(516): View more from New York

My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.

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(650): View more from California

just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

my vagina's been through so much this weekend

(1-860): View more from Connecticut

you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?

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(269): View more from Michigan

You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?

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(217): View more from Illinois

Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.

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(307): View more from Wyoming

I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way

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