So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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