i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Randomize