Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
