There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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