So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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