I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
