Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
