Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
