You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
