half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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