so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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