His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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