i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
