Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
