I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Randomize
