Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
